[Verse 1: Alex Turner, Alex Turner & Matt Helders]
I've seen your eyes as they fix on me
"What is he doin'? What on earth's the plan
Has he got one?"
You better give me some pointers
Since you are the big rocket launcher
And I'm just the shotgun
I ain't got no dollar signs in my eyes
That might be a surprise
But it's true, said, I'm not like you
And I don't want your advice or your praise
Or to move in the ways you do
And I never will

[Chorus: Alex Turner]
'Cause all you people are vampires
And all your stories are stale
And though you pretend to stand by us
I know you're certain we'll fail

[Verse 2: Alex Turner, Alex Turner & Matt Helders]
I've seen your eyes as they fix on me
Full of confusion
Your snarl is just so condescending
Trying to explain that we're on to a win
If the fee we get in
Near recoups what we're spendin'
He said, "I can't believe that you drove all that way
Well how much did they pay ya?
How much did they pay ya?
You'd have been better to stay round our way"
Thinkin' 'bout things
But not actually doing the things
[Chorus: Alex Turner, Alex Turner & Matt Helders]
'Cause all you people are vampires
And all your stories are stale
And though you pretend to stand by us
I know you're certain we'll fail
'Cause all you people are vampires
And all your stories are stale
And though you pretend to stand by us
I know you're certain we'll fail

[Instrumental Break]

[Interlude: Matt Helders]
(All you people are vampires)

[Instrumental Outro]