[Verse 1]
Brian, top marks for not trying
So kind of you to bless us with your effortlessness
We're grateful and so strangely comforted

[Refrain]
And I wonder, are you putting us under?
'Cause we can't take our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination
Well, see you later, innovator

[Verse 2]
Some want to kiss, some want to kick you
There's not a net you couldn't slip through
Or at least that's the impression I get, 'cause you're smooth and you're wet
And she's not aware yet, but she's yours
She'll be saying, "Use me, show me the jacuzzi"
I imagine that it's there on a plate, your high rendezvous rate
Means that you'll never be frightened to make 'em wait for a while

[Bridge]
I doubt it's your style not to get
What you set out to acquire, the eyes are on fire
You are the unforecasted storm, oh

[Instrumental break]
[Verse 4]
(Brian) Calm, collected and commanding
(Top marks for not trying) You leave the other story standing
With your renditions and jokes, bet there's hundreds of blokes
That have wept 'cause you've stolen their thunder

[Chorus]
Are you putting us under?
'Cause we can't take our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination
Well, see you later, innovator