I met your father, he said he sold cars and he makes a lot of cheddar
I knew your mother, she wore a dress last night, we all agreed we wanted her

Oh, the way you puff on your "cig"
All the people here must be watching you

Dating boys who dropped out of school
Nowadays they just clean your pool

I'd rather just see somebody, then force it upon myself
I'd rather just get a feeling, then waste time with someone else
I always knew that you'd run off with some boy who'd live in his office
Always knew that you'd end up with kids and a suburban coffin

I met your boyfriend, I asked him if he minded that you still post pictures of your bare skin on the internet, for all the other boys to see

Oh, the way you sip on your drink, all the people here must be watching you

Showing your skin to everyone doesn't make you desirable

I've come to find the realest boys don't feed into an outside image
Come to find the realest girls don't feed into an outside image
Come to find that you and I don't really have that much in common
Come to find I've learned to mind a sexy waist with "half a mind"