[Round 1: E. Farrell]
I said, yo!
Apologies to all my fans who been expecting a hit
I had some real life issues come up to be dealt with a bit
Then I dropped 20 pounds to pretend I was sick
Asked for Mook, and hoped NO ONE would remember this shit!
This gon’ be different, Flex, I hope you warned your team
A sad look, and I put that on everything; that’s the Jordan meme
I came out west to say some shit that's sort of mean
So you gon’ get killed at home by a dickhead, like that Clockwork Orange scene
See, I already love this city, more than facts
My bro Daylyt showed me all the best spots to get restraining orders at
I said, “It's cool, you ain't gon’ do me no harm
A ‘roid rage the only time you'll see a mad flex shooting them arms."
But fuck the jokes
Just keep a distance when we rapping
Cause I paid some cholos off that'll split you into fractions
Think ticket sales, cause if you fuck wit me, this a killing
Give me limited space, and you gon’ get a buck fifty in the building
They like, “E, that's how you punchin’? It's too soon.”
True
This shit I bottles up's a trip, like huffing on poop fumes
Plus a bar from MadFlex that's more than nice is sort of like an orange slice
(Why's that?)
You getting it once in a Blue Moon
I give a fuck what this douche bag fool packages
Your crew's faggots, a fruit salad, it's too saddening
And if your dudes acting true savages
I'll Facebook spam you a few battles and
Have you scared to remove tags like new mattresses
Look, it don’t matter if y’all with the shit Flex brought
As far as a Fresh Coast fit, you're equivalent to wet socks
You probably spent this week sitting at your desktop
Trying to get hype while giving yourself pep talks and listening to Plex Rock
Meanwhile, I been whipping up a fresh pot
The way I'll son you’s different; I ain't kidding, I'm your step-pops
Like midgets serving top shelf liquor how you'll get stopped
Cause the bar's been set so high that you can’t even hit me with your best shot
So, I don't want to hear no shit that end with “Eazy-E”
You got to go crazy; thinking out your right mind's your only chance of seeing me
And yo, that shit was fucking nice
I'm breaking down your thought process
Cause the right side of your brain's what makes a vision come to life
And you could Ask Jeeves if you ain't ever known
The shit I bring smarter,King Arthur: if you got a point to set in stone
Get taken out, I’m nicer wit the quotes
It ain't an issue to get Mad shelved when everything he’s writing is a joke
I could’ve said “magazines”, like clips that jam
Since I'm known to pop punks but got a Simple Plan
To have you looking stupid over nothing/nutting quicker than a minute man
You just gon’ stand there and give me the win (wind), cause you my biggest fan
Yo, round one, we ain't gotta discuss it
I swear that was my lightest shit
Well, actually, it probably wasn’t
[Round 1: Madflex]
Shouts to the vets ducking that battle with Flex
Real Deal said financially it has to make sense
But he might shut that shit down in your class if you're ten
I know, you making big moves, Trevor; we won't ask you again
Hey, fuck him
I picked a writer that I had to respect
And brought him out to the West
That's not true. I have to confess:
I came to see if a virgin could have a dad bod, and the answer is yes
The man ain't a threat
Like I'd have a hot battle with a dude who'd eat a condom full of heroin, and then not travel
Look at you
You still booking through false bravado and I wasn't asking Avo' to talk to Hollow
But every time I hit up G's it was followed by silence, it was not staccato
They don't get it
Weak today, hot tomorrow
Most of what I spit go over heads, I'm Triple H with that water bottle, so try to follow
But we building a classic like...
Nah, fuck that, you sound better when you absent
Get cracked and do the math, then flush it down the toilet
It's no portable The Saurus girl, I came to put this whole card on the canvas
Boy, you ‘bout to get your ass kicked
Get ravaged; one jab clip
Turn him around quicker than walking by a bad chick
You don't have shit
Nah, fuck you; you see low green (Cee-Lo Green)
He’ll catch the first 48 from my last three 16's
Add it up, you wack as fuck
You need to give me more space than some JNCO jeans
You ain't been killing shit like I've been
Women's bathroom, go ahead and freshen up, fuck how hot the line is
Tread light, and get a grip though; you been out of alignment
I follow E.F with that G check, I ain't alphabetizing
This is second nature
You always got some mark down watch like a jealous neighbor
But the cliche suits you, that's the yellow ranger
Don't get in danger
Keep pitching these bitches that less is greater
And watch him hit the floor so many times, now you an asshole on an elevator
And I wrote that before Money Bagz; he no showed, to Hell with haters
I still miss Caddy
Show up like Will Smith cabbie
Eyeball that Fresh plate, everyone in yo' home smell you later
I'm nice
Thank you
I need that rack, ‘cause, that's your cue to break out
Cause you ain't solid enough for stripes
Fuck your life, I struck the light under the butane for him
Veruca Salt round, dude can fall down with these goose eggs on him
You ain't near my level, pipe down, but you ain't warping
No arrogant talk back, from the best Eric in Talkback
Ah, Farrell(feral)
That's a starved cat. Man, you ain't Foreman
If these words hit a nerve, it ain't a toothache forming
This is not a drill, lets get back to the root. Wait for it
Dolla dolla bill: I'm back building with my face forward
Cause a dollar bill got a building on the back and a face forward
You like that?
The lesson of the day going, don't show up to the game if you ain't scoring
Man, I keep hearing E pushing keys
I mean, maybe, do you play organ?
Like, what, you got “haymakers for neighsayers”?
If you train horses
You pay for it, I corpse him with a Liu Kang horse kick
Fuck around and it won't matter if the shoe game horrid
I boot his lip, the 12 wings turn to the Flu Game Jordans
What up, Spice Rack?
Nah, me and you, the pay grade ain't the same rate
Book club: I just got to make sure we on the same page
Cause all your punches hit, but they whip before they nae nae
Start butting in, I could start button him, and save this played game
Believe me, uh(bulimia), I put a lot of time into this straight waste
I didn't want to work this out in my house
But I’d look so fucked up if I skipped you; this is Leg Day
Good luck man, don't get your shit kicked off of the main page
[Round Two: E. Farrell]
I took this match up cause you got a fire pen
I mean, to me your writing’s number one, on a scale of fucking five to ten
They say you like a white Passwurdz with the style, when
You more like an incorrect password, check your caps lock and try again
It's tiring how you cramming your rhymes
A flight delay when you write that way, cause shit ain't landing on time
We see you ramble on lines
And try n meet today(2-day)’s standard with a rushed delivery like Amazon prime
I know your flow's the core of how you open doors
But when these leagues got you feeling you under pressure
Kinda like the ocean floor
You need to punch with conviction, focus more
Cause when you choose to speak it's a nudist beach
You nowhere(no wear) close to sure(shore)
You ain't suited up to play here, I’m better
Plus, you did your last three match ups in this format, and that ain't very clever
You should learn to change gears whenever
Cause the point of going Back to Basics isn't just to fucking stay here forever
That's why you should shut your mouth
I got a punch for every Cali match you had, no one gave a fuck about
So those that ducked you probably got a point
Why test Flex(-)ability in this(dis-)location
When he proved that he can't get it popping in the joint?
And I hope you thought that shit was soft
I wrote a flex ability bar just cause I know how much they piss you off
See, disrespect’s what I'm ‘bout
I once battled Cortez and choked the whole time
Just so the footage wouldn't ever come out
I’m different
See, Flex cool, but I was best left off alone
And since this corn rose(rows) to the occasion
If he get it twisted here(hair), I'll knot his dome
I’ll tell him, “Watch how you talking, homes,”
Cause dog'll get a two-piece in his mouth
Like the sunscreen bottle if he cop a tone(Coppertone)
Life's a beach; I’ll catch you trying to kick up your feet in sand
And pull up in the Jeep wit some big shit to sweep the land
Even if you bring the pigs, I’ma get to meet(meat) with cans, like eating spam
Sock a(soccer) bitch and let it kick over green; that's Mia Hamm
I know because we seasoned fans, it seems we fam
I'll tell you that I need a hand, then have you flying from a hook, you Peter Pan
We should at least had planned to put up each a grand
Cause I ain't got to post my Don't Flop battles in Talkback to see a band
At this point, killing all y'all is too necessary
Facts, I'm getting paper for the principle: school secretary
Charge a rack for a mixtape feature
You should probably take notes from the kid like a fifth grade teacher
And anyone who think I'm Stephen Curry getting thirty’d by Flex
Is talking crazy out the ass: Eddie Murphy in Shrek
Round two, I ain't came for classic
I put Brian in a box
Like a guy whose name was Brian died and eventually was placed in a casket
[Round 2: Madflex]
Putting this cub scout on the thug route, was whose decision?
Was it you? Come get him
I'll wait, I'm used to chilling
Like... Any bark, ’n’ E. (N.E.) heart break, that's New Edition
Your moms mastered the science of fucked up genes(jeans): that's True Religion
Schemes: but I don’t buy it, he lose commission
Get through the mission
I know Bad Dudes; you know Shaq Fu, we moving different
Tell Avo this shit is Roscoe’s; I'm through with chicken
He spent his life as a proven victim, y'all knew the symptoms
And y’all react to his fake-ass punches? Fuck y'all too for flinching!
I'm too efficient
Look, do I choke? No, you get bars ’til you stop: I use submissions
I got goons to kick in
And, pop, put money under a pillow, you'd think a tooth is missing
Boom, hit him
Mix the jab-cross with the shoe position
’til that hook follow a tackle, and I ain't tuna fishing
I'd supply some good advice if you would listen
They just got to add a little paper to cook E(cookie); that's Confucianism
At this point, I'm just fooling with him
Call up Dot and let that "um Berretta" open up in his house
Like, "We ain't worried ‘bout superstition."
Eric, I fuck with you…
Youtube‘ll get it
I fuck with you, but you a mild substitute, a euphemism
I got charm ’n (Charmin) wipe my ass with fabrications you have written
Truth to fiction: Spice Rack, go hold down the herbs
But I'm known round the world
And you known ‘cause Bangz louder than a comb down with a curl
He say he pop Molly? He will throw down with a girl
And you can pick up the pieces
Tell this chump I want some background funk: we playing Toejam and Earl
Look at me, dork
The hands come out for a broken man down, it ain't the peace corps
You leave, or get hammered in a trunk, now you a tree fort
What the fuck you want it with me for?
When you looking as uncomfortable as you without a keyboard
And hella squares on his side like Nike Elite shorts?
I got messages for squares, so, grab a Post-it
It's just a little light when you snap; that's a glow stick
Who you roll with?
What? Ya'll break my shell for the cream like crab chowder?
That coward couldn't break news if he was Matt Lauer
Flex: rap game Jack Bauer
No Chilla Jones shit, like "tear a wrist when Mad counters”
It just takes a week to learn what I've done in the past hour
Keep the soda
Teach him yoga; dog posing flat downward
You'd get caught if you got into dirt, that's warning track power
Relax
There ain't no reason to score this match
Just upload the shit to YouTube with a corpse attached
I'm so beyond, I mean, you know me; Obi Wan
Cause I can force the hand
I'm through with this moving through duplicates, ‘cause this ain't Orphan Black
And I ain't holding back without a torture rack
A single punch ravage through his body and transform a cat
And Ravage a Transformer cat, so when I say transformer: facts
But if I spoke like you, it's "fayacts"
But when I say transformer, facts
Cause first it meets the eye, then you get more than that
Motherfucker, now you die, and I’d bet one or two lives
That you ride with a bank account balance that fucking matches your shoe size
In summary, Eric, your mama should’ve got her tubes tied
Fuck you, guy
[Round 3: E. Farrell]
I got a story that might just make your day
(It might not, either.)
One time I faced a J, then hit the club to sip some Tanqueray
I threw my balls at your bae(bay) like the A's came to play
She didn't didn't shut my game down; just covered all bases, that’s a rain delay
Translation, homie: I got drunk as shit and fucked your bitch
I’m kidding, I just got drunk as shit and let her suck my dick
She even topped the whole squad off 'cause she likes the whips we drive
Before she left, everyone was blew: Eiffel 65
Fuck your life
That's some shit I’m hating on
Cause to me, son ain't really that bright, out here trying to break a don(of dawn)
Its like as a baby, you was dropped by your crazy mom
And your head had taken more hits than my favorite bong
But you don't smoke pot, that got me really surprised;
This whole venue’s stoned, bro, even the ceiling is high
Real rap, I bet you're prolly mad at weed
And think that being a pothead
Will surround you with more fruits than fucking Johnny Appleseed
See, getting fucked up's just something Flex don't need to write raps
Pull a joint out, he gon’ look at you like Jesus Christ's back
Go to spark it, he’s like, "Please don't light that,”
Then he just might snap and kill the buzz like a Venus flytrap
But try that here, I ain't gon’ be the one that's laughing;
Out of nowhere, I’ma get it shaking with Flex: muscle spasm
If I throw a left fist or right at homes, his nose ‘ll break
Then he gon’ feel right at home with a red bridge like the Golden Gate
Fuck stretching em wit a Ruger
I’ma take you to school, and then teach you a lesson like I'm your tutor
Like how Avocado booked this and CT’s 3 hours ahead:
I'll be talking to a vegetable in the future
Yeah, so you gon’ lay with your frame broke
I got a gun that spit so crazy, shit came with a raincoat
And when I pop it at your face and your brain smoke
Your third eye could open up, but you ain’t gonna stay woke
I ain't trying to have Flex offended, just flex my pen
Cause I got less than 10 bars ’til we back to being friends again
It's just sad I had to fuck up your movement
Never should’ve got Mad in the first place, like I jumped to conclusions
They say my drive been watered down; that's a car pool
But I think I still spit solid; that's hard drool
If they said you heating up, it's just ‘cause you aren't cool
Plus, all your punchlines are shit: you have bar stools
Boo
I got bigger fish to fry, and Brian ain't an obstacle
Now I got to stick with jokes like I ate a Popsicle
Plus, that MadFlex name is comical
Cause you getting straight bodied, while I'm bending over backwards
Just to make it possible
I said I cared about this, I probably lied
I just wanted free tickets to see Carter Deems live
And that’s still on the bucket list
That's all for now folks
If MadFlex ain't at World Dom I’ll be fucking pissed
Time
[Round 3: Madflex]
I don’t want to be mean to you for another round, Eric. It’s gonna go bad
You came out here looking like the product of some one-night stand with Absyrd-
No, you don't understand, it gets worse
You came out here looking like the product of some one-night stand with Absyrd
Did the fucking fusion dance with a Amber Alert
That still ain't better than a no show
I start attacking E ’til plasma streaming from his head; wanna Go Pro
Then you curl up, and I leave on a high note like Soul Glo
Frodo, this charity
I mean, it may be deductible
These motherfuckers paid you in Lunchables
Don't talk about money, if he do, don't trust this fool
Lactose intolerance, cause you just got a little cream and it makes me uncomfortable
Bump knuckles, we’d catch a case like fucking bellboys
If you flex an arm connect, it is a frontal deltoid
You got more goons in JeFF’s Mustang than the one that fell Troy?
Cool, the whip next to the ratchet: shit, I'm Uncle Elroy
You hear that?
Get used to those
It just happens when a true man show versus The Truman Show
Here's some shit that some of ya'll hoopers know
He missed his shot, but he goes down no matter how you spin it
What's that? Shooter’s roll
You a troll
You got "da feet" bars. I'd never use one though
Cause I don't fuck around with da feet, boy, I'm in cruise control, the usual
The 50 Super Bowl dumped roman numerals
A.K.A. Take this L, you played yourself
It's "let's work" ’til the network make a joke disappear, this one here Dave Chappelle
Well, you a little more Velma, Shaggy, Brennan Dassey
I'm an athlete
And Clark Kent came out the booth like, "I thought I was half geek."
Half the room knows, Dan Larusso with the bad knee
Is the only time in his life that he's seen somebody clap heat
Now, I can't tell if you animated or anime, kid, your style is mad cheeks
20 battles, I still ain't heard you to rap, E
Get the picture; I tag E
Collapsing back teeth all hit the damn street
He pick it up, pick it up, pick it up: that's Black Sheep
I'm nasty
Fix the crib for your girl like Nick and Gatsby
Then your Boo ain't never leaving the house: it’s Mr. Radley
High school education bars
You ain't a star, Farrell, fuck rap
Your whole stack fit into a mason jar
I lay a beat down until E sound like bass guitar
You a shooter? No. You get Happy to play for par
And you pay a goon or two to root for you cause you can't raise the bar
Jackass
Nah, the care package void
Get drilled for real, a southpaw to scare Pastor Troy
You lack the poise
I mean, you something that these squares can enjoy
But you fronting in the hood so hard the airbag deploy
You terrible
I throw my fist in just to fish from the bottom barrel?
This bull come to a close(clothes) like the Rock's apparel
I am not comparable
You keep ignoring the cost
You horrible, boss
I'll kill him, why you calling (Colin) Farrell?
This a waste of movement
‘cause you mixing in more fake drums than eighties music
And I start to feel a hatred brewing
I mean, it’s Eas(z)y, E, and for the Record, it may be Ruthless
But you not my cup of tea cause the tables turned, that's a lazy Susan
I hate these new kids
They ain’t proven, and they ain't seen shooting
I got a gun in the safe with the safety safely rooted
And I did not bring the shit, I ain't gon’ use it
Look at him
You don't let the tech blast, I don't stress that
True to form, Human Torch:, you (poof) hold your fire when you get mad
You get that?
Nah, Flex- that jabroni is Dellavedova to Kobe
Puttin’ Goldberg the wrestler vers’ Goldberg the goalie
Dethrone me?
Hoe, please, your whole steez is dopefiend
I'm so deep in the game even the old me was an O.G
White man flash (slap), red hand, don't crosswalk no streets
Me and E trade, my stock too high; those seats come with nosebleeds
I'm testing switchblades on resting bitch face
You the homie
You the first person I'll tell when I tell ‘em that I got 0-3ed
Eric I got 0-3ed
Organik, if I'm not on World Dom than you can blow...
Your money, elsewhere, it's your loss, O