[Intro]
I don't want a date for Christmas
I don't need a mouth to feed
I don't want to buy you dinner
Or to take you home with me
I just want them on my phone
Take some pics when you're alone
Send some video too
All I want for Christmas is n***s

[Verse 1]
I don't want a lot for Christmas, just a couple shots I need
I don't want 'em dark or blurry taken on your iPhone 3
You don't need to know my number, send 'em to my burner phone
You can even send on Grindr, just as long as you stay home

[Chorus]
Cause I don't want you here tonight
Keep your distance, I'm alright
But, send me one or two
All I want for Christmas is n***s

[Verse 2]
I won't ask for drugs this Christmas, I won't even ask for blow
I just want an unlocked album, wrap it in a big red bow
Send me what I want for Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa too
Gonna get me naughty listed, with a hole-y pic from you
[Chorus]
Sexy selfies in ring light
Cropped and filtered, that's alright
Maybe some Facetune
All I want for Christmas is n***s

[Bridge]
(Ba-da-bah!)
Oh, I know you're only an Uber ride away
(Ba-da-bah!)
And oh, you could come over, but I wish you would stay
Oh, the snow is blowing, it's too cold for mistle-hoe-ing
Baby, don't regift, take a JPEG or a TIFF
And if you don't, you can sashay away-ay-ay-ay

[Verse 3]
I don't need you up my chimney, you can stay in Bethlehem
I just wanna hear your sleigh bells sliding into my DMs

[Chorus]
Maybe with enough egg nog
After New Years, we can talk
But until we do
All I want for Christmas is n***s