[1: Gene's Confession; Gene]

[Verse 1]
I woke up in the night, 'cause I was on a mission
To get downstairs and do some mermaid fixin'
Her hair was a mess and I knew what to do
But then a rumble in my tummy said I need to poo
I was feeling light like I could dance a jig
I grabbed the crimping iron and my favorite wig
It's time for your hair to strut, no more limping
I plopped on the wig and then I got to crimping
I went back upstairs knowing we'd win
But I left the crimping iron plugged in

[Chorus]
It's all my fault
I set the restaurant on fire
It's all my fault
I burnt my dad's dreams
With my wiggy desires

[2: Louise's Confession; Louise]

[Verse 1]
I woke up from a dream in the middle of the night
And thought of a way to win the gold
Help Mom's structure really stand out
By making thе mermaid explode
I'm talking; M-80s, bottlе rockets
Roman candles, sky missiles
Or even dynamite--
I didn't have any of that stuff
But I had some sparklers
And those things are fun enough
Anyway, I shoved like a bunch of them into the mermaid
[Chorus]
It's all Gene's fault
He set the restaurant on fire
And maybe it's partially my fault, too
But Gene's guilt definitely ranks higher

[3: Tina's Confession; Tina]

[Verse 1]
I wanted to fix that ugly mer-thing
So we could win the prize
I wasn't expecting the mermaid's crimped hair and sparklers stuck all over everywhere
I thought she'd look better in a blue bikini
Instead of being all thrown-up greeny
The paint was pretty wet
So I plugged in a fan
Which in hindsight might have not been a great plan
'Cause you know oxygen and fire, you-you do the math

[Chorus; Tina, Gene, Louise]
It's all our fault
We set the restaurant on fire
It's all our fault
Everything went haywire

[4: Hugo's Confession; Ron]
[Verse 1; Ron, Kids Ron and Kids]
It's all Hugo's fault
He set your restaurant on fire
It's all Hugo's fault
Even though he didn't want to mention it
It's not our fault
Tina: I mean the stuff we did didn't help
It's not our fault
Louise: It's nice to get to blame someone else
It's all Hugo's fault