[Verse 1: Bob]
This wedding is my warzone
And I'm the doctor in it
I've got to save their special day
Got to cater it to the limit

Something so important
Our burgers were their Cupid
Gotta give Farrah and what’s-his-name
A perfect reception
To prove my job’s not stupid

[Verse 2: Bob & Linda]
So do I take this meat to grill just right?
I do
Take this cheese to melt on top so nice?
I do

Bob, this isn't on you
The ceremony was upsetting
The way those two rushed into this
You'd think it was a shotgun wedding

[Verse 3: Bob, Linda & Both]
But do I take these buns to have and hold?
I do
All you can do is do your best-est
Toast them perfect so their love grows old?
I do
They are a couple of hot messes
And do I swear that I won't screw this up?
I do
Bob, you're crazy
And do I need this more than anything?
Do I think you've lost your mind on this?
I do